Ant Jokes Funny

Ant Jokes

Why was the baby ant confused? 

Because all his uncles were ants. 

What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes? 

Antteneye! 

What do you call an and with frogs legs? 

An antphibian! 

What do you call an ant that won't go away? 

Permanant 

Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat? 

Because he was pissed off. 

What kind of ants are very learned? 

Pedants! 

What do you call an ant who can't speak? 

A mutant (mute ant). 

Why did the ant cross the road? 

Because he needed to buy deodorant! 

What did the pink panther say when he stepped on the ant? 

deadant deadant deadant deadant. 

What do you call a well-dressed ant? 

Elegant! If three ants are lost in a jungle. 

Who do u call to find them? 

The Minister of finance.(find-ants) 

What do you call an ant who can't play the piano? 

Discordant! 

What kind of ant is good at maths? 

An accountant! 

Where do ants go for their holidays? 

Frants! 

What do you call an ant who skips school? 

A truant! 

What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics? 

All sorts of antics! 

See more: Funny adult jokes

Presidents' Day Jokes Funny

Presidents' Day Jokes Funny

What did Americans do because of the Stamp Act? 

They licked the British. 

How do you to play War of 1812? 

You burn down a White House. 

What kind of tea did the American colonists want? 

Liberty. 

Who was the biggest jokester in George Washington's army? 

Laughayette 

What was the most popular dance in 1776? 

Indepen-dance. 

Do you know the 16th President of the United States? 

No, we were never introduced! 

What does the Statue of Liberty stand for? 

It can't sit down. 

Where was the Declaration of Independance signed? 

At the bottom! 

What do you call a Nebraskan who hates Democratic Presidents? 

A CORNservative. 

Why did Barack Obama bulldoze the Rose Garden? 

He didn't want any Bushes at the 

Whats the best birthday gift you can give to George W? 

An Exit Strategy from Iraq. 

What is Bill Clinton favorite instrument? 

A sexaphone! 

See more: Funny short jokes

Hair Color Joke Funny

Hair Color Joke Funny

After the baby was born, the panicked Japanese father went to see the obstetrician. 

"Doctor," he said, 

"I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine." 

"Nonsense," the doctor said. 

"Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool." 

"It isn't possible," the man insisted. 

"We're pure Asian." 

"Well," said the doctor, 

"let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?" The man seemed ashamed. 

"I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice a month." 

"There you have it!" the doctor said confidently. 

"It's just rust." 

See more: Funniest short jokes

Virility Joke Funny

Virility Joke Funny

Funniest short jokes

Three men, a Jewish man, a Catholic man, and a Mormon man, were having drinks at the bar following a business meeting. 

The Jewish man, bragging about his virility, said, 

"I have four sons. One more and I'll have a basketball team!" 

The Catholic man pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, 

"That's nothing, boy. I have 10 sons. One more and I'll have a football team." 

To which the Mormon man replied, 

"You fellas ain't got a clue. I have 17 wives. One more and I'll have a golf course!" 

Mummy Jokes Funny

Mummy Jokes Funny

Funny jokes to tell 

Q: What was the mummies' vacation like? 

A: Nobody knows. They were too wrapped up to tell us. 

Q: What is a Mummie's favorite type of music? 

A: Wrap!!!!! 

Q: Why was the mummy so tense? 

A: Because he was all wound up. 

Q: What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done? 

A: Ok, that's a wrap. 

Q: Why did the mummy cross the road? 

A: To get un wrapped 

Q: What do you call a mummy who eats cookies in bed? 

A: A crummy mummy! 

Q: Why don't mummies take vacations? 

A: They're afraid they'll relax and unwind. 

Q: Where do mummies go for a swim? 

A: To the dead sea 

Q: What do you call a little monsters parents

A: mummy and deady 

Q: How do you scare a mummy 

A: with a yummy dummy in a crash test crummy.